My own
by Sunshine1985
Summary: Sora loves Sunao, Ichikawa loves Nagase, Shinichiro loves Nanami – but nobody loves Matsuri. Really? I guess there is someone who would never agree to this. Warning: OC and shounenai
1. Chapter 1

Sora loves Sunao, Ichikawa loves Nagase, Shinichiro loves Nanami – but nobody loves Matsuri. Really? I guess there is someone who would never agree to this. Warning: OC + shounen-ai

Disclaimer: I don't own "Sukisho"/"Sukisyo" or any of the characters of "Gakuen Heaven"

Warning: OC (POV), shounen-ai (boy loves boy)

My own

1

My name is Nakajima Kaoru, seventeen years old, hair-color deep red, blood type A. I'm a second year at Seishin Academy and captain of the karate team. I also use to spend much time with the student council because our outgoing president Shinomia-san recommended me as his sucessor. For this reason there would have been quite enough excitement for me this year. Apart from working for school and training with the team I would also have to campaign. So I guess it's not the right time to have a crush on someone. No, it's definetly not the right time to fall in love with a classmate. You may be asking 'why not' now but that's just because I didn't mention yet that my school is an all boy boarding school. Only boys. Therefore the object of my desire is male. And indeed I would be glad whether this was the sole problem. The truth is that the guy is very well known all over school for being a weirdo, acting daffy and hyperactivly taking photos of every embarrassing situation he gets to see. Unfortunately the truth is too, that I could laugh about his slogans all day and I think about his laughter all night. I'm totally smitten with his long blonde hair and his amazing turquoise eyes. I'm pretty sure he doesn't even know my name, but whenever I see him my heart starts jumping. Even though I'm only a few centimetres smaller than him (and he's stunningly tall) by the time we randomly meet I just feel petty. He will never notice me and as a candidate for the student's presidency I have no chance to make him see… Dammit. I shouldn't have thoughts like this. All I should think about is my training, my schoolwork and my candidacy – I can't dissappoint Shinomia-san, who trusts in me. But still all I can observe is this one person: Honjou Matsuri.

-

These days make me feel uneasy.

Hashiba Sora one of my schoolmates was hospitalized. He had fallen out of the fourth floor's window but luckily only gained slight injuries. Still we don't know the reason for this occurrence. I discussed the matter with president Shinomia who asked me:

"Do you think he really fell out the window because of being sleepy like some pupils say?"

I shook my head "We inspected the place of happening. The window was destroyed completely and there were glass spinters everywhere. This is only possible if someone went through the glas by force…."

"So" Shinomia-san interrupted "For that you think he tried to kill himself?"

"If he was then only out of affect." I replied without further thinking "Normally suicides are commited by taking poison or slicing an artery, not by running through a window. Even if he wanted to die by jumping, I think it would be more typical to jump from a roof…" I was a real smartass back then, huh?

"So" Shinomia-san's face had some kind of a strange look "Seems like you've thought about ways to commit suicide intensely."

WTF?? Did Shinomia-san really think I would?! That's absurd. Fortunately he continued

"In your opinion Hashiba-san is someone who would try to kill himself? Should I as the student's president interfere?"

What should I have answered on this? Sure, I know Hashiba Sora by name and we have got several lessons together but actually we never had a conversation going deeper than 'Good morning' or 'Enjoy your weekend'. Under no circumstances I had the impression of him being labile. However he is none of my friends, we are not close, so he might feel suicidal and I just wouldn't have noticed. Maybe I should have talked to him more frequently. Suddenly I felt guilty. Isn't it always like this? Someone kills himself and everyone says 'Oh my god, I had never see it coming, he seemed happy as ever'. Just like everyone else I'm a bloody ignoramus. I guess I'm not suited for presidency…

"Kaoru?" Shinomia-san intercepted my thoughts. "You are considering hard. I presume you're not sure?"

"You're just right, Shinomia-san, I'm not sure…. I'm sorry. I can't tell what Hashiba is thinking, I don't know him that good. And therefore I have no idea what made him fall."

"So am I" the president gave me a reassuring smile. "I don't know him either but I guess noone knows everyone's heart. That's why we have certain friends."

He is great. Isn't he great? No, he isn't only great, he is what you call amazing. President Shinomia is empathetic and friendly, calm and warm, although he is the perfect type of a leader, strong, ambitious and selfconfident. I truly admire him but in the middle of my heart I fear the burden of being his successor.

"Kaoru?"

I shouldn't be that absent-minded, I know.

"Don't' worry to much."

He shouldn't be that compliant, I think.

"Let's see what we can do without jumping into the matter. Do you know anyone close to Hashiba? His best friend?"

"Um.." Sure I know the closest friend of Hashiba Sora.

"So?"

"I guess I do, however only by name, too." I got to clean my throat here.

"That's ok. If only you know whom to talk to."

WHAT??? Talk to? Him? It can't be. Shinomia-san does not really want me to talk to… Matsuri.

"Would you mind to go and see him today or tomorrow? I would feel relieved if he thinks of the whole matter as an accident. If not, we got to do something in order to help Hashiba to regain strengh."

Oh, I wouldn't mind to go and see Matsuri today or tomorrow. I wouldn't mind to go and see him everyday in forever. The problem is just…

"Would you, Kaoru?"

Certainly. I will just go to Matsuri, fly myself into his arms and… Dammit, did I just blush?

"Sure, I will, Shinomia-san. I will immidiately look for him…"

"No," Shinomia-san laughed "Hashiba is still in hospital and out of danger. There is no need for you to skip your clubactivities. You can look for that guy later…"

Clubactivities? The only club I can think of activities right now is the Matsuri-Fanclub. I'm the first member, president and treasury (but clubs with only one member aren't accepted, so it only exists in my phantasy..)

"By the way." The president is really patient. If I were him I would have kicked my own ass by now "Who is the guy you are thinking of?" Shinomia-san wants to know

"Honjou Matsuri." And YES I am thinking of him. Always.

"Oh that guy." Shinomia-san said and I know he was thinking 'jerk' but he would never say it out loud.

Dammit. It's really not the right time to have a crush on someone, especially I shouldn't be in love with…

-

"Excuse me." I knock at Honjou Matsuri's door. I have never been here before. On the door there is a signboard telling about 'dorm master Matsuri, a festival and the suggest just to ask him for whatever' Some people might have naughty thoughts reading this, but not me, I'm just cool.

"Please come in." I hear his voice from inside.

I enter the room, looking for my host. He is sitting on his desk printing pictures. And he is the most beautiful person I've ever seen in my life.

As he recognices me, he stands up.

"Nakajima-san, hi, how are you?" he welcomes me. I had not expect him to know me.

"Thank you, Honjou-san. I'm sorry to disturb you." I'm surprised. My voice sounds absolute sedately and I act as if I'd feel just easy, eventhough I do not.

"Oh, no problem! Please take a seat." He is pointing to his bed. I quietly sit down and he places himself on his only chair again. I'm only SITTING on his bed, you crazy people! Nothing else is happening. We are both fully dressed.

"How can I help you, Nakajima-san?" Matsuri asks me

You could get undressed…

"I'm here at the request of president Shinomia. He wishes some question to be discussed with you."

"Oh, your predescessor?" He queries. Does he doubt my motives?

"Our current president." I feel my smile getting frozen. I don't know why.

"You will be at the next election, nobody doubts that." He still smiles so warmly. "You have been his right hand since the two of you met, so it's only logical for you to be his follower."

"You are informed about the council matters pretty well." Am I being harsh?

"A wee bit." He responses friendly.

"Not many people are." This was meant to be a compliment but it doesn't sound like it. "I mean.." I want you, now! "the majority of the students doesn't even know our vice-president Iwai-san. I guess everyone could tell he was vice-president and none would even question it." What the hell am I talking about?

"Yeah." He approves. "It's a great pity."

"I guess." I say regarding my feet. I guess, I should stop saying 'I guess' and just change the subject. I look up into his eyes. They are so amiable and he is still smiling at me, even though I don't deserve it.

"President Shinomia." It's like I'd dwell upon this subject yet. "Is very worried about Hashiba Sora who is supposed to be your closest friend."

"Is that so? Sora is doing fine." Matsuri ensures me. "He only has slight injuries and will be back at school soon. There is no need to worry. Sora really had good luck. But please thank the president for his concern, Nakajima-san."

Ok, how to say it gentle?

"The student's council is wondering whether he wanted to commit suicide." I go like a bull at a gate. I really deserve a kick in the ass today because I'm acting like a complete asshole. My friends used to call me insightful, I guess they are wrong (I guess again).

"Oh." No smile anymore.

That's all my fault. His friend fell out of a fourth floor window and all I express are the wishes of some useless punk's association – forgive me Shinomia-san.

"I mean…" I try to give it a better turn. "If he feels overwhelmed by some problems, maybe we could be helpful, I mean." 'I mean' isn't any better than 'I guess' and saying it twice in one sentence makes it worse.

Suprisingly my beloved Matsuri starts to smile again. An unbelievable reassuring and at the same time disarming smile.

"Just as I told you." He states "There is no need to worry. As you know there will be a transfer soon and after this transfer Sora will always be happy, I guarantee you. Because the student who will join our school is Hashiba Sora's true closest friends and the love of his life. So you see, there's no necessity for sorrow."

Aureate. How can anyone be so lovely. If I'd put forth my hand I could reach him, touch him. Maybe I could even pull him close and…

"I see. Thanks a lot for taking your time, Honjou-san. I hope I didn't molest you too much. Please deliver Hashiba-san the students council's best wishes." I stand up preparing to leave.

"You didn't molest me at all, Nakajima-san. I hope I was able to resolve all your doubts." Matsuri respondes friendly. I want him to be mine. I want him so badly.

"Thank you." I bow and head for the door.

"You're very welcome." I hear his voice behind me, but I'm already out of the door. Me , the always busy future stundet council leader, me, the complete dumbass.

I walk towards my room wondering whether taking another shower would help me to relax although I have already showered three times after training before I went to meet Matsuri and it didn't help me. I ask myself if anyone knows about my feelings but indeed I seem to act quite normal towards others. Everyday I follow the lessons, I reach good results, I help out at the student council, train karate with my team and then hang out with some friends. Probably it's my routine which helps me out. Otherwise I am surrounded by people close to me all day. Is it really possible that nobody has noticed yet? Oh I wish I could tell somebody but there is noone I could talk to about this: I'm madly in love with a guy who is known as an awkward jerk even to Shinomia-san. Dammit. (I should defintly stop swearing)

I decide not to have another shower because thinking of the most gorgeous person on this planet might cause reactions I don't want to experience in public.

So I just go to bed far too early.

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I hope you enjoyed the first chapter! Please feel free to review.

All the names of the Ocs are tributes to the Anime "Gakuen Heaven


	2. Chapter 2

2

"Nakajima-kun, Shinomia-san would like to see you." Vice-president Iwai had been waiting outside the locker room. Usually Iwai-senpai is not the type to show up at a place like this and Shinomia-san wouldn't have sent him here unless he was ill-humored.

"Sure, Iwai-senpai, thank you very much. I'll go right away." I respond quickly.

He nods friendly and seems to be released as I walk towards the dorms. The president normally isn't agitated easy but whenever he gets annoyed it's my business to appease him again, simply because I'm his favorite. I ought to feel honored, but sadly I can already imaging what topic he wants to talk about with me, the whole school does.

"Come-in, Kaoru!"

I join him worried. He doesn't sound happy at all.

"I bet you know what is on my mind, right Kaoru?" He is not unhappy, he is pissed. Isn't that a little disproportionate?

"I guess, Shinomia-san."

"Hm. So what do you think about this little… event the newly founded Do-It-All-Team gave us lately?

It was funny. Late this afternoon there were flyers all over the school grounds telling about the School-Do-It-All-Team's road show. Matsuri proclaimed to more than a hundred pupils that the new club arranged a chase of Hashiba Sora and the new student Fujimori Sunao who were both cosplaying (Sunao as a PRINCESS). The one to catch them would be blessed to have them as a servant for one day. I've never seen such a fuss at our school.

Shinomia-san however seems not to think of it as 'cool' or 'fun', so I decide to take his question as rhetorically.

"I'ver never seen such a fuss at our school" he expresses through closed teeth. Just what I was thinking – if only in a little different way.

"That's what I think, Shinomia-san." It will be hard to get him down this time, particulary because I feel like being caught between two stools.

"Did you know, that there was no application to the student council about the foundation of this club?"

"…" It's Matsuri-chan's club, I don't care it there was an application as long as I get to see him.

"And the… manager of that…thing is Honjou Matsuri that bothering moron." Ok, go on avoiding the terms 'president' and 'club' for the Do-it-all-Team but don't you dare to call my honey…

"That idiot is always, ALWAYS making trouble." The president continues.

That's just not true! Matsuri may be a little hyperactive sometimes but he is no troublemaker and eminently no idiot. His marks are real good, he is one of the best…

"That doofus…!" Shinomia-san exclaims.

Stop it! Now. Or I will start crying. How can you call my sweetheart that? Why are you hurting me? You have all of my respect and I admire you so much. Why are you saying stuff like that, it just doesn't suit you.

"Shinomia-san!" that was louder than necessary, I think "Shinomia-san" I lower my voice "Do you have a personal dislike concerning Honjou?" Yeah, there is no reason for me to ask such a raiding question and it's not the best idea to offend someone you need to pacify, but still…

Shinomia-san remains still for a moment. Then – he laughs. He really laughs. Not ironically. This is real laughter.

"I think you're right, Kaoru-kun!" He normally doesn't call me Kaoru-KUN, he would be far to reserved. This conversation is truly strange.

"You know, there are persons you have never talked to and you have never dealt with them, but still, even if they do you no harm, you just hate them. Maybe that Honjou is such a person for me because altough I never spoke to him I detest him. I can't stand thinking of him and even hearing his name makes me go insane. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Kaoru, I shouldn't have said such evil things in anger. I know, I'm responsible for Honjou Matsuri like every other pupil. I guess, I'm unqualified to be the president sometimes." He expresses depressed.

NO! No you're not unqualified!

"You are human, Shinomia-san. That's the reason you're so great. It's only a fact that there are persons you have an antipathy to without any reason. That's just normal. Nobody is perfect." I'm happy. I'm happy just now. He won't shut down Matsuri's club, he won't punish him. He is just human, just imperfect and still such an amazing president.

"So, Kaoru-kun, you don't think of me as flawless?" He sounds amused. Thank goodness!

"As you see, Shinomia-sama." Now I will overdo it a little "To be honest your taste of music is awful, the permanent moving of your glasses drives me crazy and you should badly reconsider the length of your sideburns but… in fact I do adore you, highly, and I couldn't imagine a better president than you…" Uups! That was too much. Far too much. Slap me, Shinomia-san, hit me, kick me, throw me out of the window, I deserve it for real.

But nothing like this happens. Far from that. President Shinomia smiles.

He just says "Thank you, Kaoru." And HUGS me.

President Shinomia is hugging me. The chary president Shinomia Takuto is indeed hugging me. I don't know how to react. Something like this never happened before. Did I tell you that this was the first occurrence he was calling me familiar Kaoru-kun?! What shall I do? Return the gesture? He is the president, I can not embrace him!

"Shinomia-san!" too loud, too exited – I'm the morron, idiot and doofus.

Shinomia-san terminates the accolade and looks into my eyes.

Unnecessarily I feel quite uneasy being so close to the person I admire.

"Shinomia-san" I start again "May I have a talk to Matsuri. I will explain to him why the club is being shut down…."

"It won't be shut down." Shinomia-san's voice is serious again. Minato-sensei took the responsibility for the club already. Without any particular reason there is nothing we can do. But, yeah, go and tell him the workflows of a club-founding and make sure he keeps it low in the future."

"Certainly, president Shinomia." I bow.

"Alright.. And Kaoru!"

"Yes, sir?"

"Though I said I didn't like the name 'Honjou' I would prefere it if you were not using his first name."

"I'm sorry. I won't do this again. Is there anything else I could do for you?" I ask him.

"In deed there is one thing." Shinomia responses.

"What is it, sir?" I interrogate, my heart nervously beating.

"Don't call me 'sir'! We have been friends for far too long." He smiles.

"Definitely." I bow low and leave.

Outside the room I take a deep breathe. This was really strange. I have never seen Shinomia-san like this before. Maybe he was frightend by himself because of being annoyed of Matsuri…. Matsuri. My reverd president doesn't like him. In fact he really dislikes him. Without any reason.

Dammit, it's absolutly not the right time to be in love, especially now I have to advise Honjou-kun. Dammit.

Let's go into another disaster.

It's pretty late in the evening. As I reach the floor my beloved Matsuri lives I just hear the neighbor's door close. I readjust my clothes and knock at the door. No answer. I knock again. Nothing. Maybe he isn't at home – what a relief! I go to a last try.

"Honjou-san?"

"What is it, guys, I'm busy." He tears the door open. Now his body is so close to mine. Only a few inches separate his lips from…

"Oh. It's you, Nakajima."

He steps back. Dammit!

"Come in"

His face is a little tired but pleased. He seems to be one with the world.

"You're here on behalf of the president, again?" he asks me.

The president? How could I think about the president when the love of my life stands right before me only wearing a shirt and boxers. His legs are unbelievable…

"I am." I answer dryly.

Isn't it strange that I am able to say thinks opposite to my thoughts?

"So." Matsuri-chan continues slipping into his pants – dammit.

"It's about the new Do-It-All-Club, am I right?"

"You're right, Honjou-san." I will never be allowed to call him different.

"I guess the student council was a bit surprised. I'm sorry I didn't take the time to submit an application, it was just a spontaneous idea."

"Hm." Say something nice!

"I will go and apologize to Shinomia-san –"

"No!" Not a good idea "That won't be necessary at all." I exclaim.

"Is that so." His face is rather questioning.

"In the future you are to arrange the terms of keen events like today's with the student council first." Great. Lecture him, that's really nice.

"I certainly will do that." He gives me an endearing smile.

"Well." I turn to leave. This was worse than last time.

"I'm looking forward for your election, Nakajima-san." Matsuri says behind me.

I turn back to face him.

"Then you can finally say you confronted me on your own behalf."

Ouch! That hurts. I know I screwed up, but saying I'd use Shinomia-san as a pretext in order to lecture you, that's…. breaking my heart.

I digress.

"By the way." I dare to say quietly "How about Hashiba Sora. You think he's better?"

"He is, by now." Matsuri says in a happy tone "He only needed to get in touch with Nao. That's why I started the club…"

"Oh." I mumble, unable to look into his eyes. "So you did it because you cared. I'm sorry I got it wrong."

Without any further word I drop out of the room. I shouldn't have left without saying goodbye. I shouldn't have asked the last question. I should have simply left to lick my wounds. Now I can hardly hold back the tears. What's wrong with me? I didn't cry for years, however today I felt like it twice.

I walk towards my own room. It sucks to be me.

----------------------------------------------------

That was chapter two. It was a lot of fun to write and I hope you liked it.


	3. Chapter 3

3

Today's lessons seemed to be endless. I wasn't able to concentrate at all so I'm very lucky I sat out the class without being noticed by anyone. I don't know how to survive the council's meeting and karate training today. Maybe I will just skip it saying I was ill. Indeed I'm feeling very sick. It was impossible for me to find sleep last night, I was constantly thinking about what happened yesterday.

"Nakajima-kun?"

My fellow Satoshi has stepped towards my desk I'm still sitting at absent-minded even school is already over.

"Sorry." I look up to him.

"You're really dreamy today, homie. So, what kept your awake all night?" He smirks.

"Searching for porn on the internet." I smirk too. I always enjoy joking with him.

"There is someone outside the classroom who says he needed to talk to you." Satoshi tells me.

"So? Who is it?" I wonder.

"Honjou." My friend's pronounciation shows how he thinks about that schoolmate – not very good.

"Matsuri!?" I stand up in total surprise. Or was it a jump? "Honjou Matsuri?"

"I couldn't believe it myself." Satoshi-kun nods misinterpreting my reaction. "Shall I tell him to piss off?"

"No. It's ok. I'll go and see what he wants. Thanks buddy." I could fall down on my knees in eternal aplogies before Matsuri.

I pat Satoshi on the back and walk out of the classroom.

There he is, looking so frightenly good in school-uniform.

"Honjou-san." I greet him.

"Nakajima-san." He hails me in return "Can you spare a minute?"

I would gladly spend my whole life with you, love!

"Little." I respond instead. "What is it?" I'm so rude. Dammit. Dammit myself!

"Come take a walk with me." Matsuri invites personably.

And I want to go anywhere with him, I wish I could be with him but I just do not show it.

"What is it?" I resay as we take some gaits together.

"Please look at this, designated president Nakajima." Woah. That sounds odd!

Honjou-kun hands me some photographes. If I put my hand a little closer to his while I reach for the photos I might accidentely touch his finger…

"I took these only two hours ago." He states. No contact.

"Is that so?" I look at the images. They show an affray. Hashiba Sora is attacked same as some underclassman whose name I don't know. One of the assailants is Umino Yukihiko, a disturber the council had to admonish several times already. The other ones are known roughnecks, too, but their names escaped me.

"A brawl." I sigh. No, I didn't wish for nude images of him. Surely not.

"I guess the guys around Umino picked up the fight. They attacked Hashiba and the … Did they also attack children?" I'm shocked. These guys are about my age, how do they dare to attack kids?

"Infact" Matsuri explains "These ruffians assaulted the chibis first and than the fast friends, who came to rescue their protégés."

"What?!" I am outraged.

"Yes. That's just unbelievable. I knew you would react like this. I knew you hate people taking advantage of their rank in order to hurt defenceless persons."

Infact I do.

"Yeah." I answer still concerned with what I just got to know. "May I borrow these images for a while? I want to make sure the student council has enough evidence to punish them adequaetly." If they don't get kicked out but only a reprimand, I think my team will teach them good manners – on our own account.

"Sure. Just keep them." Matsuri affirms "I don't need pictures of persons like that."

Another thought crosses my mind

"Are Hashiba and that other guy ok? Did they get injured?"

"Only slightly. They have already been checked in the infirmary."

"Fine." Then it hits me

"Did you get hurt?" Matsuri-chan was involved in this damn thing, too. Oh, if my Matsuri got harmed someone will beg for death.

"No." he chuckles "I'm perfectly fine. Noone laid a hand on me."

"Good." What a relief! Umino should thank Honjou-kun on his knees for saving his life now.

"You know what?" Matsuri asks still a little giggling. "We were saved because of you."

"Hm?" Because of me???

"Remember you told me anyone could allege to be the student's vice-president and nobody would doubt it? I asserted it. And I threatened to show the photos I took on our next staff meeting." He smiles brightly "They really believed that I was a member of the council and were scared off."

"Oh." He is so smart! "That was indeed artful."

"Thank you." He beams with joy. "I will leave this to you, then. I'm sure you'll arrange everything properly."

"Just leave it to me, Honjou-san." I would do anything for you anyway. "Thanks for your cooperation." I bow.

"Thanks to you!" Honjou-kun bows too and leaves smiling.

I take a deep breath and start sprinting towards the council meeting room. I'm pretty late for the meeting. However that only suits the situation. I'm going to bounce right into the conference and announce dramatically what happened. An entrance like that will surely convince the members to punish the culprits hard.

And afterwards I will join the karate training. I madly feel like it.

Thanks for your trust, Matsuri-chan. You made my day.


	4. Chapter 4

4

"Kaoru?" After that particular council meeting some days ago, Shinomia-san stopped me from leaving with the others.

"Yes, Shinomia-san?" In fact it was no surprise he wanted to talk to me. My entry that day was quite a little unusual.

"Teenage guys attacking children is disgusting." The president stated.

"I think it is disgusting, Shinomia-san." I agreed.

"You do, indeed." Shinomia-san smiled "That's why you completely freaked out."

"Uhm." I blushed. I may have overreacted bouncing in the conference, but…

"I always admired your passionate orations, Kaoru, but I have never seen such fire burning in your eyes."

President Shinomia admired something I did? I was speechless that time and that fire was burning the skin of my face.

"It suits you!" Shinomia-san laughed friendly.

Suits me? What? Getting deep red because you payed me a compliment?

The president only laughed more, when I hadn't known what to answer and was looking down instead.

"Kaoru." Suddenly Shinomia-san stepped close to me making me look at him by positioning his hand under my chin.

I looked up blushing anew. His touch was warm and soft.

"You should show your feelings more often." The president whispered his face close to mine.

"Shinomia-sama…" I stuttered.

"Didn't I tell you to drop that 'sama' the first day we met, Kaoru-kun? Didn't I tell you to call me just 'senpai'? Indeed after all the time we spent together you could even call me by my first name, which is Takuto, do you remember?"

"SURE…I mean Yes….I mean… No… I mean…!" Stop panicking, Kaoru, stop panicking, I told myself, you're acting ridiculous in front of Shinomia-san. Stop it!

"I could never do that, Shinomia-san. That's… impossible!" I shouted out. Then after I saw Shinomia-san's face all worried I lowered my voice to explain.

"I could never call you on your first name, Shinomia-san, because I respect you so much. To me… to me you're as high as heaven and I… I could never reach you… only look up to you but never reach you… that's why… that's why…" My body started shaking, tears began to flow out of my eyes.

"I cannot be your successor, Shinomia-san, I am just too low! I… I make so many mistakes, I am so wrong. I'm just not worthy to follow you…" Right in front of the person I admire the most I turned into a crybaby.

"Kaoru…" The soft voice of president Shinomia was full of sorrow as he took his hand away from my chin and placed it on my back pulling me close.

"I'm so sorry, Kaoru." He whispered in my ear when I was resting my head against his chest. "I didn't know the candidacy would stress you so much. I understand that being with me can be a burden but not in the way you pointed out. There is no need for you to think we weren't on a par. In fact I always think of you as an equal to me. I have shortcomings, too. You remember when I wacked out because of Honjou?And you already indicated to the suboptimal length of my sideburns." On this point I had to smile even under my tears.

"Kaoru." He continued "Everybody may suffer from weakness, that's why everyone needs somebody to…. hold you when you're weak." I blushed. I was so sorry to molest the president like this.

"You would always bring my feet back on the ground, Kaoru, and I always hoped I could lift you up."

"President Shinomia…" I sobbed

"It's ok, Kaoru, there is nothing to worry about." He interrupted my excuses "I suggested you as my follower because I know you are the best for this job. I esteem your nature and I believe in your strengh…"

"Shinomia-san." I pulled back to look into his eyes while wiping away my tears. "I'm the one who should feel sorry. I…"

But the president only shook his head and laid his hands on my shoulders.

"There is no need to carry your troubles all alone. You can count on me at all times, ok? I told you to show me your feelings…"

"Thank you, Shinomia-san…" I started like this but indeed I was highly too agitated to express all my appreciation for his words. I wanted to fall down on my knees to thank him. However I just turned away and ran towards the exit.

"Kaoru." His soft voice behind me made me stop for a moment. "Just go and get some rest. I'll tell your club you had some work to do for me."

"Thank you, sir." I whispered under new tears as I stormed outside and went to the dorms.

It's been a while since that embarrassing incident but for all that I feel, I'm not only abashed but relieved after telling Shinomia-san my sorrows. The strain seems to be gone. Sometimes I even think of telling him about my impossible crush but then I hold back myself knowing I was enough of a burden for our awesome president already. Nevertheless I'm still candidate for presidency and work at the student council – even with more pleasure than ever before. I should feel ashamed seeing Shinomia-san, however he doesn't make me feel any bad. He is such a great person, I wish he could stay our president forever.

The last days went by without any noteworthiness. I guess my life isn't that thrilling, I'm a pretty average person. I never do something too special, like saving the world from a

killer-ant-attack or giving a blow-job to the president…. I mean the 'real' president, not president Shinomia-san… I mean not that I would have given a… You know, let's just forget what I said. No particular occurences the last days, that's all.

Days without outstanding incidents have also some advantages. Today I attended class, participated in the council meeting, trained intensely, met up with my friends and now finally I have time just to lie on my bed, relax and dream of…

"Nakajima-san?"

No. I'm not that self-centred, I didn't dream of …

"May I enter?"

..me!? Dammit. Why do I blush right now?

Chill, there's someone outside the door..

"Come in!" I call and sit up. (You thought I would say 'erect', huh?)

"How's tricks?" Matsuri steps in.

"Pardon, Honjou-san?" I say coldly. Matsuri is in my bedroom!!!

"I'm sorry to bother you, Nakajima-san." My visitor starts. "Today I came to see you on the behalf of the Do-It-All-Team."

The only thing bothering me is that you are not here to see me because you wanted to.

"So." My tone is still cold. "How can I help you, Honjou-san?"

I could get undressed in less than 30 seconds.

"You told me once special activities of our club should be submitted to the student council first." Matsuri explains.

"So?" I enquire impatiently.

"Therefore I have to make a retroactive announcement." He says with a splendorous smile.

"Is that so?" I respond with a biting inflection.

"Sure." His smile becomes even brighter and makes my heart melt.

"Yesterday night" Matsuri continues "the Do-It-All-Team took a test concerning the teamwork in a special cosplay act." He tells me.

"Then Hashiba and Fujimori cosplayed again?" At night?

"They did. Just like me." He giggles.

No. Stop. Don't imaging him wearing…. Dammit.

"Not to mention Minato-sensei and Nanami-san." Hounjou-kun adds.

The math-teacher, the nurse…. Matsuri in only….. Dammit.

"Aha." Is all I reply. Actually I can not think of an better answer right now.

"They pretended to have kidnapped Nao-kun, so Sora and myself had to rescue him."

"Aha." I guess there is no way to rescue me.

"Yeah. Well, do you want any further information?" Matsuri asks loveable.

Would you wear that outfit for me? If I say 'please'?

"I've heard enough." I state frigidly.

"Do you think there will be any problem, Nakajima-san?"

"I will tell president Shinomia, what you told me, Honjou-san." I respond. "It is his decision how to handle this." Eventhough I have no idea how to explain everything to Shinomia-san without using the words 'Honjou' 'Matsuri' and 'Do-It-All-Team'.

"Sure, Nakajima-san." He nods at me and turns to leave. Dammit.

"Oh, I almost forgot, Nakajima-san." Matsuri turns around to face me once again. "I heard the roughnecks we had to deal with some time ago were friendly advised to apply themselves at a different school."

"That's correct, Honjou-san." Though it's an extremely diplomatic way to put it.

"So, Nakajima-san." Matsuri says smiling at me. "Keep up the good work!"

With these words he leaves ultimately.

I take some deep breaths trying to control my heart rate. It doesn't work – my danm heart beats like a drum. My blood pressure is highly above every physiological limit. I feel like I had to do something. Just something to put my energy into. So I make the asinine decision to report Shinomia-san what I heard at once. Before I can think twice I'm already standing outside his room.

"Kaoru? Enter." Shinomia-san calls me in.

"Shinomia-san." I mumble as I step in. It's not that late in the evening but definitely too late to pay a visit like this.

Suprisingly the president gives me a more than bright smile and stands up from his desk to welcome me.

"You are still working…" That moment I feel sorry for coming here. I shouldn't have. Now I interrupt his work to tell him things he doesn't want to hear. He seems to be in a good mood, I hate myself to change it.

"Just a little. Don't mind, Kaoru." Shinomia-san replies warmly. "What can I do for you?"

Tell me you are busy and kick my ass out of here! I'm such a dumbass, I shouldn't be here disturbing you. In fact the only reason I'm doing so is because I need you to ease…

"I have something to report to you, president Shinomia."

"Hm? Do you never stop thinking of that president-thing, Kaoru-kun? There is no need to be that formal." The president laughs. He is so friendly. So damn friendly. And what about me? I'm using my precious idol as an outlet.

"I…I'm sorry." I stutter – again. Damn me.

"No need to be sorry, Kaoru. And no need to be nervous either." Shinomia-san is still laughing. He is so happy at the moment how dare I to make him upset by talking about Matsuri in front of him?

"I'm really sorry, Shinomia-san." I resay. "I shouldn't have disturbed you. Actually the reason was of no special importance. Nothing I can't tell you another time. It wouldn't change anything, anyway. Please excuse me." I want to go but Shinomia-san stops me – again. That's like a déjà vue.

"Kaoru…" His voice is so soft. "Just tell me what's on your heart."

He comes close to me placing his hands on my shoulders. Sure he thinks I will cry again. Dammit. I'm such an idiot, I was such a crybaby…

"I'm truly sorry, Shinomia-san." I guess he got that now. "Just some minutes ago Honjou told me about a special activity of the Do-It-All-Team which should be… submitted to you. Last night there was some kind of a cosplay competition and…"

"Kaoru." Shinomia-san interrupts me gently. "I already know about this activity for a couple of days." He sighs. "Minato-sensei told me and asked to keep the matter away from public. Maybe I should have informed you earlier, forgive me, Kaoru, but I just thought we talk far too often about unpleasant things like this…"

"I'm the one in need for forgiving…" I feel like an idiot.

"Kaoru." I'm rude interrupting him… Dammit

"Even if I didn't know about this occurrence there was no such acuteness accounting me. So, Kaoru, tell me what you really wanted to say. I have already told you there was no need for excuses. Just tell me what's on your heart." He uses one hand to cup my cheek. His touch is so comforting.

"Don't be afraid, Kaoru" he whispers his face close to mine. "Tell me."

My hearts starts beating like hell again. Should I really tell him what's on my heart? Should I tell him about my crush? Being with him feels so good. Sometimes I feel like shit, but then his words, his simple existence take away all may pain. If he would banish me…

"When you leave, I'll feel like dying." I blurt out. Then I turn around and ran through the door.

Damn déjà vue. Dammit. I always make the same damn mistakes. I didn't mean to say something like this to Shinomia-san. Now he might feel bad, might think I was still not ok with being his successor, might feel guilty leaving the responsibility to someone as weak as I am. Dammit. I should have stayed in bed this week. Maybe I should stay there for the rest of the year. Dammit. What else is missing to happen?

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When I reread this chapter I asked myself: isn't this too much? Would a cool guy like Kaoru react that emotional? I thought about different versions but finally I made a decision. I decided to dedicate this chapter to all the girls and guys who are under considerable strain in school, overwhelmed by first love and bedevilled by hormones. Short: I dedicate this chapter to all those who frantically try to survive puberty. ;)

Thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

5

"Last night,I saw a ghost. And it was searching for Hashiba Sora."

"Oh yeah, heard about it." Satoshi-kun nods as if I just told him the results of a football match. "Many guys saw it last night. Guess, apart from you, everyone is at the nursery in order to get a pass." He grins.

"Drugs in the drinking-water, I always knew it." I comment. At least I'm not the only one losing my mind.

"And the level of insanity will even increase the next two weeks." Satoshi adds.

"That's possible?" I don't think so.

"So, you forgot what date is to come? Valentine's Day!" He smirks as I roll my eyes.

Valentine's Day.

I hate, hate, hate Valentine's Day! I truly, madly, deeply hate it! That day the whole school turns lunatic – and it's an all-boys school! Normally one might think girls are Valentine's Day-maniacs. Completely wrong. Boys are. Boys are even worse. The academy will become a madhouse. Twosomes everywhere, everywhere!!

And how about me? I will be in the thick of it, pretending I were annoyed - while I am just aggrieved. Oh Matsuri.

Damned Valentine's Day. Dammit.

I try to forget about it and go through the day just like any other. After all there are two weeks left. So there's no need to think of such an unedifying occasion now. I only hope noone will remind me of it again.

"NA-KA-JIMA-SAN!" I hear Matsuri's voice shouting all over the corridor moments before he storms into my bedroom. Matsuri. And the first thing he says is:

"Valentine's Day!"

"Honjou?" I raise from my desk. Why don't you say something more pleasant, Matsuri-chan? Something like 'how are you', 'nice to see you' or 'let's move closer together'…

"Nakajima-san!" My unexspected guest starts enthusiasticly, slamming the door behind him closed. "Valentine's Day is to come!"

"I'm afraid so." I agree dryly but Matsuri remains completely untouched.

"There are only two weeks left!" he expresses excitedly.

I furrow my brow.

"And there are so many preparations to make!" Matsuri accompanies his words with gesticulating.

I do not answer anything.

"Nakajima-san." He lowers his voice, stepping close to me, laying his hands on my shoulders. "Nakajima-san." He repeats his body close to mine turning his head a little downwards to look into my eyes.

My skin burns under his touch. From this range he has to hear my tortured heart beating against my chest.

"I need you…"

Matsuri!

"…to talk to president Shinomia."

Oh.

Oh.

Ohhh.

He needs me to talk to the president.

Matsuri only wants me to talk to the president for him.

Sure…..

Sure.

He always wanted that when he came here. Nothing else. He just needs the concession of the student council.

Maybe he understands Shinomia-san isn't too happy with his club and wouldn't give permission to everything if he asked him personaly. That's why he uses to ask me. He knows the president wouldn't say 'no' that easily when it's me.

Sure.

That's all he wants from me. That's all.

I never had reason to assume…

"…Nakajima-san." Matsuri smiles. He smiles his wonderful entrancing smile while ripping my heart out.

"Sure." I manage to say breaking away from him.

I grab the backrest of my chair for support. I want to run away. I want to scream. I want to cry.

"That's awesome, Nakajima-san, thanks for your cooperation!" Honjou states happily.

"Whatever." I respond.

I don't look at him. I can't. Instead I'm staring at my desk.

"So, let's discuss the matters of preparation." Matsuri continues sitting himself on my bed. "You certainly are desirous of hearing what I plan for that special day..."

"I am not." I finally accomplish to look at him again. My tone is colder than ever. Too cold.

Matsuri even seems a little frightened by my harsh answer. I feel ashamed directly. I didn't mean to put it like this.

"I'm sorry, Honjou-san." I mumble "I am not addicted to Valentine's Day that much. But.." I am addicted to you, that's why I reacted so stupid "..but that doesn't matter now. I suppose you're planing some activities with the Do-It-All-Team. Please tell me about it."

In fact that was the friendliest thing I ever said to him. Ever. Although I care so much. I'm such an idiot.

"That's fine, Nakajima-san." Honjou-kun gives me a reassuring smile. "You will definitely like this Valentine's Day. It will be the best ever!…."

His eyes begin to glow as I listen to his explainations of the 'Delivery-Angel-chans': Hashiba, Fujimori and some kids shall dress like love-angels delivering Valentine's gifts from one person to another – officially or anonymous.

"It will be brilliant, don't you think so, Nakajima-san?" Matsuri asks me when he ends.

"Hm. I think there is no chance to keep it on the low." I answer, but seeing Honjou-kun's face getting worried again I add:

"But if it's only for one day, I guess it'll be ok. The students will turn insane, anyway, so…"

"Oh, thank you!!" Matsuri jumps up, pulls me close and hugs me joyfully.

I'm breathless. My feet start to lift from the ground. I feel like loosing consciousness.

I indeed feel Matsuri's arms around my shoulders holding me close. I indeed feel Matsuri hugging me. But I guess that's only logical. I mean, last night I saw a ghost searching for Hashiba, why shouldn't I hallucinate the one I love holding me right now, that's…

"You are great!" Honjou interrupts my thoughts, leaning back to say these words into my face. "I knew I could count on you. You always will support the sincere interests of other people, even if you're not concerned personally. Thank you so much, Nakajima-san!" he shouts effusively.

"Thank president Shinomia, if he allows it." I reply exertedly while Matsuri loosens his grip.

He just grins and turns to leave, fully concerned with thoughts about the upcoming event. However, as he reaches the door, Matsuri stops.

"Nakajima-san, what is your favorite chocolate?" he enquires. "Someone might asked me this, because he wants the Do-It-All-Team to give something to you. You are the future president and for that very popular and…."

"In that case, Honjou-kun." I intercept. Suprisingly enough I am able to answer calmly. "please tell that person I will not accept any Valentine's gifts. There is no need to give me something just because I am a candidate for presidency." I accentuate the last words excessively.

"Whatever you wish, Nakajima-san." Matsuri laughs and leaves.

"Delivery? Angel? Chans?" Shinomia-san asked close to burst out laughing.

"Exactly." I tried to stay gravely but actually I had to smirk, too.

"That's what they want? For Valentine's Day?" the president continued grinning.

"That's it, president Shinomia." I responded trying to repress a snicker.

"Delievery-Angel-chans?"

"Delievery-Angel-chans, Shinomia-san." In fact the situation got more and more risible. I only wondered when I would loose control and let out all the laughter I was choking on.

"So." Shinomia-san cleared his throat and went on prentending he was serious. "I suppose.. " dramatical pause – indeed he had to stifle his laughter. "I suppose there will be a big fuss, Kaoru." That moment he finally chuckled silently.

"Oh. There will be, president –" That was enough, I couldn't stand it anymore. As a matter of fact we shouldn't have laughed about the upcoming events, but I guess we were both just happy to discuss something that cushy.

"For that.." the sublime president giggled "For that reason why the hell should we allow something like Delievery-Angel-Chans in our school? Can you tell me, Kaoru?" Despite joking like that, I knew he already was sure to suport the fun.

"Um. You know, president Shinomia." I started with my most serious face. "Every year on Valentine's Day there is great commotion about all the 'shall-I-or-shall-I-not-give-him-my-present?' or 'how-to-give-it?'-stuff, so nobody would concentrate on the lessons…."

"You actually think, Kaoru, allowing 'Delievery-Angel-Chans' would make the pupils to pay more attention to the lessons?" He was definetely amused at my attempt.

"Actually not, president Shinomia." I conceded now grinning again.

"Actually not." Shinomia-san aggreed and continued quietly laughing "Just tell Honjou to go on with the preparations. I hope it'll be a joy for everybody."

"Thank you, Shinomia-san." I bowed.

"No need to, Kaoru." He nodded when I head for the door.

"Hey, Kaoru." The President stopped me at the last moment.

"Shinomia-san?"

"Didn't you say once you hated Valentine's Day, Kaoru?"

"Essentially I do, president Shinomia." I answered.

"So do I." Shinomia-san replied.

We smiled at each other as I left the club room.

Yeah, it's only been a day since I made fun about the Valentine's Day's agitation and now I spend my day off in a confectionery. Dammit. I'm such a fool.

Actually I should be sitting in my room working on the candidacy speech, I have to give only a few days after that whole Valentine's bunkum will be over.

Actually I shouldn't be standding in front of shelves full of chocolates desperatly trying to find the perfect one.

Matsuri.

I have no idea what to give him. I have no idea what he would like.

The only thing I can think about is his warmth. His arms wrapped around me. His breath in my neck.

I blush.

I blush immensly on this thought.

Dammit. That shouldn't have happened. It's so cruel. How shall anyone hide away from the sun once he has experienced it touching his skin? Dammit.

Suddenly I know what chocolate to choose. I walk over to a special shelf and pick a certain expensive white chocolate containing a large amount of sugar. I am addicted to this sort, although I only buy it rarely, because this chocolate is so sweet, that it hurts. Just like Matsuri. So that's exactly the right one to express my feelings.

As I make my way towards the cash desk my eye incidentally gets caught by the sight of the chocolate type which I know is Shinomia-san's favourite. We sometimes eat it together when we have to stay late in the evening in order to get some work done. I buy this chocolate, too, in order to lighten up the president's mood on Valentine's Day. I guess he will need something to calm his nerves then.

Finally successful I get out of the shop and make my way back to the dorms.

Attained in my room I pull out a drawer to fetch a large envelope. I put the white chocolate in and add the payment for the delievery job just like a typwritten letter asking to hand this Valentine's gift over to Honjou Matsuri. Naturally I do not sign it. I'm such a coward! If I wanted to express my feelings I should just tell Matsuri. I should stand his laughter and the heart break and just walk on. Unfortunately I can't. I'm far too afraid of the pain caused when my heart is torn out.

So later in an unwatched moment I place the envelope in the assignment-box of the Do-It-All Team and leave it like this.

The following days I try hopelessly to prepare the speech I mentioned but am unable to concentrate at all. The only light in these days are Matsuri's advertising speeches for the Delivery-Angel-Chan's work he uses to give before nearly every lesson.

Isn't he cool?

Far too soon Valentine's Day is there. It's not quite the fuss I imagined. It's worse. Everyone freaks out. Even Satoshi-kun plays up when Hashiba and Fujimori – both dressed in large nightshirts and wigs – deliver some pralines to him.

It's really hard to be the only person on this planet who hates this date…. Wait. Not really the only one.

As soon the lessons are over I walk over to Shinomia-san's place. There won't be any council meeting today, it got cancelled because of you-know-what.

I find the president sighing at a mountain of gifts piled up on his desk.

"Wow." Is my only greeting. I know, president Shinomia surely is the most popular guy at school but that amount of presents is impressive.

"Guess." Shinomia-san answers still facing all the boxes of chocolates.

"You know what is the worst thing about Valentine's Day, Kaoru?" he continues after some time. "I don't even like pralines." Shinomia-san shows a half-tired-half-slightly-amused smile.

"That's indeed dreadful." I agree and grin myself.

"Big commotion out there, hm?" the president is now looking at me.

"Yeah." I nod. "Did you see Hashiba and Fujimori?"

"I did." Shinomia-san approves. "They delivered most of this stuff here." He points at the gifts, but then he smirks. "They wear nightshirts."

"They actually do." I laugh.

"Yeah." He laughes too. This is surely not the most bacchanal conversation we ever had, but it's still feels very comfortable.

"So, Kaoru, is there any particular reason you came here to see me?" The president suddenly questions.

"Nope." I respond veridically shaking my head. "I just feel better now after seeing another person who hates Valentine's Day." With these words I rummage my knapsack to find the bar of chocolate I bought for him and hand it over.

He looks surprised at the candy so I explain:

"You like this, right?"

I smile at him again and leave.

Feeling released like I always do after talking to the president I walk slowly towards the gym. There won't be karate training today either but I just feel like working a little on my own. As a matter of fact I prefere it from sitting behind the table waiting for satori concerning my oration. Fortunately there are still three days left so I don't have to panic.

For this reason I train nearly two hours, shower copiously and get back to my room at sunset trying to avoid the sight of dozens of twosomes – unsuccessfully.

When I reach my floor I can already see from a distance the message pinned on my door. As I come closer I read:

'Dear Nakajima-san, we, the Delivery-Angel-Chans, were instructed not to accept assignments to hand any presents over to you. Just as you wished we rejected all petitioners and gave the gifts back to them. We beg you to at least accept the anonymous ones, because we can not give these chocolates back. Happy Valentine! The Delivery-Angel-Chans.'

I sigh loudly and take the corresponding envelope. As I open it I find two presents. The first consists of selfmade chocolate-bits boxed in shining paper (which has the same color as my hair, really suitable, ha ha) decorated with a golden ribbon. The second one is the same bar of chocolate I assigned to hand over to Matsuri.

I lay down on my bed and go to sleep fully clothed.

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Yeah, I know, far too little Matsuri in this chapter. He will have a far bigger part in the following ones, I guarantee you.

Thanks to everyone who reads this, you make me happy!

Greetings to my nee-chan, who loves Shinomia.

And: Kaoru, don't you hang aroung dreaming of Matsuri all day. Make sure to fulfill your duties properly! ;)

Lots of love, sunshine


	6. Chapter 6

6

Don't panic, it's too late anyway.

I try to becalm myself standing infront of the stage, on which I shall hold my candidacy speech in a couple of minutes. It's not like I wouldn't have thought of preparing something, it's just that I wasn't able to think of anything. Oh, the expression 'anything' might be wrong here. To be honest I thought of something, someone to be accurate. Honjou Matsuri. Dammit. Dammit Valentine's Day. Useless fabrication of the chocolate's industry! Dammit. If it wasn't for Valentine's Day I wouldn't be standing here, listening to one of my rival candidates telling that he recieved the disgustful high amount of 127 gifts. Hearing his self-aggrandizing words I wonder, how many of them this pansy bought himself. Dammit. Actually I have no reason to think so arrogantly of him. Indeed he is the captain of the football team and really good-looking, so at least he gives the audience a reason why he was the right one to represent the school…. Yeah, and what about me? I have the full support of the great president Shinomia and the whole council – and I couldn't even prepare a speech. The situation doesn't improve a bit, because I'm known for my passionate speeches, I guess. Shinomia-sama, you picked the wrong person for this.

"…And if you elect me, there will be fast food for lunch everyday, free laptops for everyone and no lessons on Mondays…" Now my second rival is speaking and I wonder what the hell he is talking about. Free laptops? What does he think the president is? Santa? On the inside I shake my head. This election is about nothing but popularity. The one of us three who is the most popular will be the next president of our school, will be the successor of president Shinomia. My gorge is rising. It can't be. The follower of my adored president is choosen because he promised fast food? Or because he spends his whole day in front of a mirror, telling himself how great he was? A person like this should be a substitute of Shinomia-san? Thinking of him I look up to the stage where he sits quietly listening to the orations given. I know he secretly rolls his eyes hearing the pledges of this jerk. This nonsense. The president understands that everything this guy promises is blah. The council understands. I understand. Presumably the guy himself does. However he might get elected because of his visonary thoughts. Maybe he is better than that barbie…. Shinomia-san realises that I stare at him and squints with a smile. Shinomia-san. No, president Shinomia. He never thinks of being popular or anything. He is beloved by so many because of different reasons. Because of himself. Because he doesn't think of himself as great, but indeed is. Because….

The second candidate has finished. Now it's my turn. I'm last, maybe least. As I walk up the steps slowly I still do not know what to say. My thoughts are somewhere else. 'President Shinomia, forgive me. I beg you to forgive my weakness. All I ever wanted, was to be at your service, but now, but the truth is…'

"My name is Nakajima Kaoru." I put my hands onto the sides of the lectern and look down on it as I introduce myself, then I look up to face the students. "On Valentines's day I received two presents." Pause. "One of them I bought myself." I hold in for a moment and watch the audience, who fell completely silent. A few guys try a sheepish laughter on my statement but the majority just stares at me. I proceed "There sure are reasons for that. On the one hand I'm not blessed with the looks of a goddess, on the other I'm in no way connected to Bill Gates or Burger King." I stop anew. Some of the pupils look at me as if I was a ghost, others hold in their breathe. I can litterally feel the faces of my rival candidates freeze in the background. I'm sorry for that. I didn't want to be mean. I never wanted to attack them personally. I didn't even mean to call their words dumb. Nothing like this. It's only that I need to put something out. I need to express what I think the presidency, no, a president is all about. I need to explain, I desperately do, how I feel about president Shinomia.

"For that." I continue "I won't be able to give you a representative looking like Brad Pitt and I won't be able to cancel the Monday's classes, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm an incomplete, imperfect person and that won't change if you elect me. All I can offer you, all I can put into the presidency, all I have to give….. is my heart."

With these words I turn around, walk down the stairs and leave the assembly hall. This was pathetic, ashaming and … disappointing.

I was a dissapointment to Shinomia-san I realize when I fasten my steps. Paradoxically in the corner of my eye I imagine a rush of gold starting to applaud.

-

In the evening the school is empty. There is a big rowing event outside everyone is watching. Everyone but me. I take the opportunity to walk through the halls peacefully. I didn't speak to anyone since my embarrasement and I'm still not in the mood to. As I take my way through the second floor my heart suddenly stops. There, right before me, is the ghost I saw three weeks ago. And – he is holding hands with Satoshi-kun!

"Hey." Satoshi-kun greets me muted, his face slightly red when the couple comes close.

"Hey." I reply muted, too.

I try to keep my cool – or get back to it – and nod mildly smiling at the guy beside my fellow.

"You're…?"

"That's Hiromu!" Satoshi answers agitated. "He is…" Satoshi squeezes the hand of the pretty boy tighter "He is my….."

"We are lovers." Hiromu joins in with a bright smile.

"Aha." I respond excessively brainy.

"Yeah…" Satoshi-kun affirms turning crimson now.

I look for a way to ease the situation and try to start a casual conversation:

"So, how did you guys get to know each other?" The moment I speak this words I want to bite my tounge. Stupid, stupid, stupid question. Stupid Kaoru! That will sure make things easier, oh yeah….

"Ohhhh!" the little boy starts happily to narrate. "That was about two and a half weeks ago, when I returned from hospital…"

"Oh." I make another intelligent comment but Hirumo just continues to explain.

"You know, from the first day I came to this school I was totally in love with Hashiba Sora."

"Oh." I state anew. Better be quiet from now…

"Sora-senpai looks so amazing and he acts so cool." The sweet guy goes on.

I take a short look at Satoshi and recognize that he really doesn't like these words too much.

Hiromu starts again: "I even got to talk to my adored Sora-senpai the day I returned and he was just as cool as ever. I was so happy, so happy I never was before."

Yeah, Satoshi-kun indeed dislikes this statement.

"But then…" Abruptly Hiromu's eyes get even more shining. "Some hours later I wandered through the school on my own, when I suddenly felt weak and lost consciousness. Later Nanami-sensei told me I had overdone it and should not push myself too much. He reproved me that I could have hurt myself badly by the fall if it wasn't for Satoshi-senpai to catch me." He stops and smiles at my buddy, who gladly returns the gesture.

"Satoshi-senpai stayed with me at the nursery. He cheered me up and talked to me all the time. That was when I discovered that he is not only good-looking but nice. He is friendly and smart and funny. He will always make me laugh." the younger boy giggles softly. "All these years on Valentine's Day I gave something to Sora-senpai secretly. But this year…" and he smiles even more at Satoshi "This year I could only think of one person to give something to. And I wanted to tell him whom the gift was from. I was too shy to hand the pralines over myself, so I assigned the Delievery-Angel-Chans to do this but I signed it. The whole day I waited for an answer from my beloved but nothing happened and I was totally sad. But then, one day later, Satoshi-senpai met me in an empty classroom I was to clean the board. He thanked me for the chocolates and … asked me out!!" the little boy does a little jump at these words. "I thought I could never be happier than by talking to Sora-senpai. but the happyness I felt back then is nothing compared to the joy and pleasure I felt when Satoshi-senpai said that he liked me. The joy I feel right now." With this Hiromu nestles to Satoshi who wraps his arms around his new boyfriend.

They are dating for three days.

I feel like leaving their privacy to them and turn to leave. I only stop to say: "The two of you are the cutest couple I've ever seen."

I have already taken a few steps away when Hiromu yells after me: "Nakajima-senpai, your speech was so cool!" and Satoshi-kun aggrees: "We will vote for you, homie!"

I only laugh at this and leave.

Cute couple, indeed.

-

The following days are strange. Totally unexspected, people pat my back telling me how much they liked my oration and would surely vote for me – without any ironic undertone! I cannot believe it when Iwai-senpai approaches me after a council meeting, lauding me, saying he absolutely understood why Shinomia-san picked me as his assisstent and particulary as his successor:

"You are very similar to Ta.. Shinomia, you know. Both of you cling to the ideals of integrity and sincerity. You have the same caring heart and maybe even the same self-doubts he has…."

"Self-doubts?" I ask unbelievingly.

"Sure." The vice-president smiles. "Shinomia may seem untouchable but actually he worries a lot. He always wants to do everything right and is totally afraid to do something wrong…."

"Shinomia-san is….?" But why am I asking something that stupid, Shinomia-san sure is self-confident but not megalomaniac.

"Afraid. Yes he is." Iwai-senpais voice turns soft talking about his classmate. "About every decision he makes. He would never admit it in order to not make anyone worry, but I know what it looks like on the inside. Shinomia is not arrogant at all.."

"No he isn't." I aggree and I feel uneasy. Actually I never thought of the president like this. Same as I never thought of him carrying fears of being insufficient. To me, Shinomia-san is beautiful, strong and perfect.

"No, he isn't" vice-president Iwai reechos my words. "And you aren't, too." He adds.

"I'm sorry I did you wrong, Nakajima-kun. Indeed I never liked you…"

WHAT??

"I always thought of you as spoiled and pampered by the president. I always thought you were nothing but some arrogant brat…." The vice-president holds in for a while staring at his feet. Now he seems to feel uneasy.

"But…" he starts anew, voice broken. "as I said, I did you wrong. I never gave you a chance. I never…" Iwai-senpai stops, looking down again. He swallows.

"I did you wrong, Nakajima." He says. "You are not arrogant at all. Not spoiled. Not pampered. Takuto chose you because he recognized your heart. What's on the inside…"

Pause.

"After your oration I know better. I got why you said the things you said. You said those things because you cared. Cared for president Shinomia. The trash these idiots before you said, dragged the presidency in the mud. Popularity, empty promises, hot air, nothing. That's not what a president stands for. That's not what Takuto stands for. Never. And noone has the right to put it like that, noone has the right to blame Takuto. Someone who is so caring, so patient, so gracious…"

"You empathize a lot, Iwai-senpai." I interrupt.

Iwai-san's face shows that he abruptly got frightened by his own words. I feel sorry.

"Guess, I do." He aggrees quietly. Then with a stronger voice he states:

"I'm sorry. You are like him, Nakajima, you are. You are worthy, I understand that now. And I will support you, future-president, I will."

Without any further words he leaves.

Iwai-senpai, no need for apologies, I got your reasons.

-

Iwai-senpai…

I can not concentrate on my homework but only think about what I heard a few hours ago. Iwai-senpai, I understand you that good. I know exactly how you feel. Dammit.

In blind actionism I pull out the drawer of my desk. Inside there are the two Valtentine's gifts I received. The sweet white chocolate I bought and the little red box with the golden ribbon. I take this last one out of the drawer and turn it from side to side. I never wondered who gave this present to me. Some underclassman, I suppose. No real affection. Eventhough, the gift was done with some effort. Maybe someone meant… Franticness takes over as my eyes fall on the withe chocolate in the drawer and I throw the red gift-box into the refuse-bin. Dammit. Affection is not returned. Dammit.

I close the drawer and lay my head down on the table. Someone knocks.

"Come in." I call but do not mean it.

"Nakajima-san?" Matsuri's voice asks softly behind me.

"Ma…" I jump up and stop immediately when I see his face shocked.

"What's…?" I want to question but Honjou-kun only points at the dustbin.

"That's a Valentine's gift." He says tonelessly.

"Um." I look at the trash can myself, where the present-box is enthroned on a lot of rumpled papers.

"Someone… put a lot of effort in this. Put his feelings for you in this… And you throw it away. You only throw it away without any further notice….. You're so cruel!" Matsuri whispers witah trembling voice and runs off.

"W..w…" Wait! I want to shout, but I don't.

What should I tell him? How should I excuse? This whole Valentine's Day-thing meant so much to him and I… I … I act if I'd really don't give a damn. I ruined his vision. I refused the feelings of someone, he wanted to support. I affront his work by throwing a gift away his team delievered.

I'm nothing but an asshole, why should he stay?

-

Three days passed by without any sleep.

Three days and I don't even feel tired. I only feel sad.

Sometimes I wonder when I will finally collapse out of inanition but then again there is no fatigue, only pain.

Matsuri.

Matsuri, I'm sorry. So sorry. I didn't mean to do you harm.

Matsuri.

Today I'm called to the club room where president Shinomia holds his office. It's a Saturday afternoon but he asked me almost imploringly to come. I naturally aggreed.

I presume he wants to talk to me about the future campaigning. After the candidacy orations there is only a school-newspaper's interview to give a couple of days before the actual election.

And: there is only one week left. One week before the elections and a couple of weeks until the end of this schoolyear, when the current president Shinomia Takuto will leave for university. My stomach cramps at this thought.

The room I enter lies silent. Shinomia-san stands in front of the table waiting for me to appear.

"Sorry it took so long." I excuse.

Shinomia-san waves my apologies aside and steps forward.

"Don't mind, Kaoru." He smiles. "I'd gladly wait for you to come all night." Does he smirk? I'm not that late!

The president seems to read my mind and giggles quietly.

To get lost of this disconcerting situation I clear my throat: "You wanted to talk to me about the future campaigning, president Shinomia?"I ask.

"No." The president shakes his head.

Oh. My. God. I knew it. He doesn't want to talk to me about future campaigning. He wants me to retire! It's because of this embarrassing speech I gave. He never said something about it but he must have hated it. And now he hates me….

However Shinomia-san smiles warmly.

"I don't want to discuss the campaign or the presidency, Kaoru-kun." He begins softly. "I want to thank you."

Thank me????

"Thank me, president Shinomia? What for?" I'm confused when the president walks around his desk and pulls out a drawer to fetch a bar of chocolate – the one I gave to him on Valentine's Day.

I grin inwardly. Maybe Iwai-senpai was right, we are similar in some cases.

"For that." Shinomia-san says explainingly pointing on the chocolate. He hasn't eaten or at least opened it – on that he is a little out of character.

"No need to, president Shinomia." I reply. It was not such a big deal anyway, just a little gesture to cheer him up. In fact I suppose he got at least a billion of chocolates on Valentine's Day.

"Kaoru, finally stop that president-thing." He scolds me playfully. "There is no need for that. I think I told you at least two million times. And I think there is reason to thank you."

"Ok." I give in. Awkward scene, we should change the subject.

In the meantime Shinomia-san came back aroundthe table opening the wrapping of the chocolate and steps towards me. He breaks a bit of the chocolate and comes close.

A little too close. Knee-jerk I take a step backwards.

"Kaoru." Shinomia-san says tenderly.

The president's hand finds my lips and puts the chocolate bit into my mouth.

Woah, what's with that?

Shinomia-san leans forward to whisper something in my ear.

Wait!

If that is meant to be a joke, if you are doing that to make fun of me right before you kick my ass all the way to Brasil, before you abandon me, because I was a dissapointmet to you , then that may be a deserved punishment for my failure, but…. I know I fell in disgrace, but such a way to embarrass me, that's.. that's… that's just not you, Shinomia-sama. You have never been cruel, never. Never.

Before tears can flow out of my eyes the president starts to talk:

"I want to thank you, because you finally convinced your feelings, Kaoru."

… Ok, now he is talking about my pathetic speech. His undertone doesn't even sound sarcastic, that's even a more merciless performance.

"You tried to do so before, I know that. I guess you were afraid. Afraid your feelings would not be returned. Afraid of what I would think, maybe…"

He is not talking about the speech. He is not talking about politics at all.

Shinomia-san is talking about feelings, about being in love.

'Afraid your feeling would not be returned' – they aren't. 'Afraid what I would think' – yes, I was.

I was afraid to tell him about my love for Matsuri, I was afraid what he would think. He said he didn't like Honjou-kun - in what way would he react if I told him the person he disgusts was my only desire?

I was such a fool. How did I anticipate I could hide it from Shinomia-san. The wise, empathizing president?

He knows it. He knows I am in love. He knows it is Honjou Matsuri that I fell for. The beautiful, intelligent, funny, wild, caring Matsuri is the one I love. Why should I hide it?

Didn't Shinomia-san always tell me to convince? And I didn't. He tried to support me even in that matter but I rejected all his attempts to help me. Dammit, I'm an idiot, why didn't I tell Shinomia-san from the start that…

"You told me you admired me." President Shinomia continues his speaking. "You told me you adored me, missed me…"

Yes, president Shinomia, I did. And I meant all these words. I suppose you want to blame me because I didn't ask you for help earlier, but…

"but you never said, you loved me."

….

"Altough there was never a reason to be afraid. Kaoru, I love you, too, I need you and I want you."

This scares the crap out of me. Don't say things like that, Shinomia-san, please don't, not even as a joke, just do not say something like you'd love me. No….

"I feared," Shinomia continues "you would not feel quite the same kind of love I feel for you. I feared you might only see me as an idol, a big brother perhaps, not… not as a lover."

Lover? Lover?? L.O.V.E.R??? YOU AS A LOVER???? What…

"Guess I was a fool." He goes on still close to me.

I can't move, not breathe, my body is frozen.

"I was so jealous about everyone around you. Can you imagine I was even jealous about Honjou because of the carressing way you looked at him?"

I feel quiet laughter in my ear, Shinomia's breathe on my neck.

"You were so close to me and yet so far away. I looked at you and your presence, your endearing words were so sweet that it hurt." He giggles again.

However I could not even think of laughing, although that whole damn thing was nearly ridicolous. So sweet, that it hurts? – the chocolate I gave to Matsuri, the chocolate I received, could it be…?

The president leans a little back to look into my eyes, fondly petting my cheek.

"Now this is over. Now everything will be ok…"

OK?? Goddammit, nothing is ok at all! Say that, Kaoru, come on, open your mouth, say something!

"Now that you gave me a Valentine's gift yourself I now you want to be with me, either."

Be with you? No! I mean I like you, I admire you, I adore you – but I love Matsuri, noone else!

Say that, Kaoru, come on, tell him before it get worse.

"And now, we will be together."

No! You are the president, I am your successor. That's it, nothing more. Nothing more. Nothing. You are not the one I love, you are not Matsuri..!

Shinomia closes his eyes as he leans in.

He is going to kiss me.

He is going to kiss me!

Say something, Kaoru! Protest, scream, cry, run away! Just do something before… Dammit, move!

But I can't.

I can't move, can't speak, I can't do anything.

I am just standing here wide-eyed and not even tears want to come out.

Nothing

Shinomia-san' face comes closer.

And closer.

Our lips will touch…

Then everything becomes dark.

-

I don't know how much time has passed when I open my eyes in the nursery. Only from the lighting conditions I can tell it's around sunset.

"You're awake, Nakajima-kun?" Nanami-sensei steps close to the bed I'm lying in.

"Nanami-sensei?" I sit up. "What..?"

Nanami-sensei mildly shakes his head and starts to explain:

"You collapsed, Nakajima-kun. You had too much stress in the last couple of days, I suppose."

"I didn't sleep well lately, Sensei." I aggree and look down. Could it be, that all was nothing more but a nightmare?

"You did not sleep well here either." The doctor replies. "You were so agitated in your dreams I was afraid you had caught a fever… But I guess there are some different reasons for that."

Still I don't look up to face him. Then another thought strikes my mind

"Shinomia-san…."

"Brought you here." Nanami-sensei interrupts me "He was very worried and wanted to stay with you even when…"

The sensei stops for a moment.

"I sent him away. There was no use for him being in the nursery. I have no treatments for a broken heart."

The moment he says this I look up scared, but before I can ask something the sensei already answers my question:

"You talk in your sleep." He states simply.

Then it was not only a nightmare. It was real.

"What did I say, sensei?" I want to know.

"Enough, Nakajima-kun, you said enough for him to know how much he means to you, but you're in love with someone else. Shinomia-kun will get over it, he only needs some time.(+)"

"So." I look down.

"Yes, Shinomia-kun had to recognize how you feel and now there is nothing you can do for him to cheer up now." Nanami-sensei puts one hand on my arm.

"But" he adds "There is someone who has been sick for three days yet and you could cure this person easily by just repeating your own words."

Sick for three days, like me??

"What do you mean, Nanami-sensei?" I ask still depressed.

"Matsuri is in his room now…" The doctor responds.

"Matsuri?!" I start up unbelieving.

But Nanami-sensei only smiles warmly saying:

"He likes you, too."

I shout a 'Thank you!' when I am already half way through the door.

-

Matsuri! Matsuri! Matsuri!

"MATSURI!!!" Before I can think anything I storm into Honjou Matsuri's bedroom.

**…To be continued**

-

-

(+) _Some weeks later the former student's president Shinomia Takuto graduated from school. Coincidental he later attended the same university as Iwai Koji did and Shinomia-san found out that sometimes the only thing you're looking for is the one thing you can't see….._

---------------------------------------------------------

Author's Notes:

Ok, that was chapter 6! How did you like it?

Primarily I planned to put Matsuri's reaction in this chapter, too (to give sweet Matsuri-chan a bigger part that way), but then I thought in chapter 6 happened more than enough stressing the nerves of our poor Kaoru and for that I will give him a little break until chapter 7 ;) The next chapter will be the last one and finally it will be all about Matsuri (just because I love him!!), all questions should be answered by that final part.

Thank you so much for reading!

yours sunshine


	7. Chapter 7

7

Matsuri! Matsuri! Matsuri!

"MATSURI!!!" Before I can think anything I storm into Honjou Matsuri's bedroom.

I find him outstretched on his bed. He looks at me wide-eyed as I enter and sits up.

I…

I…

I don't know what to say.

There is Matsuri, sitting on the edge of his bed and I am standing here helplessly.

I walk towards the place he is resting, frequently opening and shutting my mouth but no words will come out.

Matsuri.

Without any words he reaches for my neck and pulls me into a kiss.

In a moment of brightness we both fall back on his bed and I come to lie on him.

Keeping silent he wraps his arms around me as we drift off peacefully.

-

Early in the morning I wake from the most pleasant dream I ever had.

"Nakajima-san?" Matsuri asks from beneath.

Matsuri? Asks? From? Beneath? Wh…???!!!?!?

Could it be? Could this be true?

"You know what?" he continues rolling over and placing himself above me.

I can feel his knees between my legs, his hands on my shoulders pushing me down – this is true!

"In fact.." Matsuri states. "..I should kick your ass."

His shining blonde hair falls on the slightly crinkled school uniform he had been wearing all night. Matsuri, you can do whatever you wan…. Kick it?

"Wh...?" I wish to question the reasons but get silenced by his serious face.

"Nakajima, how dare you to throw away my gift…" he says in a severe tone.

Then he lowers his voice when he leans in "…and let me die on sweetness?" Honjou-kun looks into my eyes smiling.

I let you die on sweetness? I'm the one who suffers from lov…. Wait a minute! Your present?

"Your present? I threw away your…?"

Matsuri sighs deeply and shakes his head. Done with this he points on the side of the pillow and I take a look at the place where strains of his golden hair meet my red.

"The red box with the golden ribon?" I whisper in disbelief.

Matsuri sighs again.

"Now you finally get it, huh?"

"But..but…" I stutter and Matsuri runs assuasively his fingers through my hair.

"You actually think… " his voice is a little rough but playful "..I would indeed allow you to sleep in my bed … if I didn't like you, Nakajima? What kind of person do you take me for?" He grins a little as I blush.

"You gave this to me…." And I threw it away because I thought you would have returned my own gift, I'm such an idiot.

"Yes. I gave this one to you, Nakajima. This one and not the sweet white chocolate you gave to me."

"How..?" How do you know? How do you know my thoughts so well, Matsuri?

Matsuri giggles softly.

"I'm the manager of the Do-It-All-Team." He explains fondling my cheek. "I'm perfectly informed about every bit of chocolate that changed his owner on Valentine's Day."

"But I…"

"Yeah, sure. You assigned anonymously, Nakajima-san." He laughs "The big envelope with the type-written letter – that's so you, Nakajima. What did you imagine? We doing a specimen of the handwriting?" Honjou-kun laughs a little more.

Sure. That's really me. Overdoing everything I should not.

"However to be honest I was not completely sure." Matsuri admits. "Until your candidacy speech..."

My candidacy speech…. My face turns crimson.

"It was so cute!" he adds. "And nice and honest – as far as you were convinced." Honjou-kun grins "You didn't recieve a single gift you bought yourself, I knew that. But on the other hand knowing you recieved the same type of chocolate you gave to me, I supposed you just got it all wrong. I wanted to tell you but then…" Matsuri takes a short break "I guess I was just.."

"I'm sorry." I whisper. I know I hurt you. I hurt you by throwing away what you made for me, by thinking you would've rejected me and rejecting you afterwards without knowing. I thought it was you who gave the sweet white chocolate back to me – you, not …..

"I'm sorry." I whisper again voice broken when tears start to fill my eyes.

"Nakajima." he comforts me crushing our foreheads together. "I guess there will be a broken heart today – but it shouldn't be yours. Your heart should dance with mine."

Matsuri leans in for a kiss.

I close my eyes a moment before our lips will touch…

"MATSURI-SENPAI!!!!! MINATO-SENSEI WAS JUST RUSHED INTO THE HOSPITAL!!!" Someone screams from the outside.

-

How to describe my love's face? I think there are no words to express the horror he felt that moment. Matsuri jumped out of the bed and stormed through the door with me close behind him. Some underclassman stared at me perpelexedly as we passed the corridor in order to enter the room across from Honjou's own, but did not comment anything. There were more important things to handle. Matsuri looked troubled at the untouched beds of Hashiba Sora and Fujimori Sunao – his best friends were missing. Later he explained weird things to me. Things concerning mind-control, a laboratory, vengeance and pain. Things I cannot believe. Things I don't want to believe. Matsuri thought Hashiba himself might have hurt the mathteacher being under the control of some disturbed scientist with Fujimori as his companion... But these thoughts I only got to know later that day. The time we were standing in Fujimori and Hashiba's bedroom Matsuri didn't tell anything like that. All he did was turning to the student who brought the bad news and placed his hands fatherly on his shoulders, saying:

"It's ok, Ichikawa-kun, everything will be alright," and he added in a reassuring tone

"I will take care."

Matsuri sent this agitated pupil back to class. He made the worried boy to follow the lessons and remained himself in his friends' room.

"Matsuri?" I whispered helplessly standing behind him, but he only shook his head.

"I will go see Nanami-sensei." He answered quietly. "He will be at the hospital, I suppose."

"I'll join you." I propesed.

However Matsuri shook his head again.

"No." he said turning around and putting his hands on my shoulders like he did with the boy before.

"There will be a big commotion around the students. You are a representative, you have to stay here to calm them."

Despite of his friendly words I felt like an completely useless idiot. 'Stay here and calm the students?' Kind of odd, huh? I got that Matsuri wanted to talk to Nanami-sensei alone, maybe he wanted to be for himself just a moment to settle down. That's him. Never worry someone else, always comfort others, heal their pain, forgetting about his own… Matsuri, how can anyone be so grand?

There was nothing more for me to do than to nod and watch him leave.

I went back to my room deeply touched by my worries about Matsuri.

In front of my door there was already Iwai-senpai waiting – the last but one person I wanted to see that moment.

"Vice-president Iwai." I greeted avoiding eye-contact.

"President Shinomia fell sick." He stated dryly "Until his condition improves I will take over the official functions. I hope for your assistance." Iwai-senpai ended.

"Of course." I aggreed toneless eventhough I didn't mean it. The only one I wanted to acompany, was on his own way to someone in need.

I joined Iwai-senpai for a meeting with the head teacher who informed us about Minato-sensei's state of health. The teacher was rushed into the hospital yesterday night - it didn't look too good for him, his wounds seemed to be rather serious. Wounds. Nobody talked about the reason he got wounded and nobody seemed to know what really happened to him either. The vice-president and I were asked to avoid the emergence of rumors through answering questions properly, but assuring Minato-sensei would come back again soon. I was not too pleased with the idea of lying to the others. The sensei might die.

Worried, sad and still feeling helpless I visited the classrooms where I was assailed by dozens of questions concerning the already existing rumors of Minato-sensei's death. There were even people speaking of a common suicide of him, Nagase-senpai, Hashiba and Fujimori. I did my best to put an end to all that fuss while I wished Matsuri could be here by my side. He has such a great talent becalming and comforting people.

-

I met Matsuri again late in the evening. He was sitting outside on a bench holding the crying Ichikawa, speaking to him quietly and giving him hope. I waited until the student was gone and sat down next to Honjou-kun.

"How are you?" he asked.

That doesn't matter now.

"Matsuri." I said softly reaching for his hand.

He looked at the ground as he continued

"I'm sorry for the way I left this morning.."

"Matsuri." I said again gripping his hand tighter.

"I'm really sorry." He resaid trying to hide the pain in his eyes by smiling.

"Matsuri…" I ran my fingers through his hair, knowing there are no words to comfort him. One of his important persons was hurt so badly, that he might die. His best friends were missing and he did not know if they would come back.

Matsuri…

Slowly he sank on my lap trying to explain everything he heard from Nanami about the cruelity Hashiba and Fujimori had to experience while he went away when they were little.

I didn't say anything. I just listened to him when silent tears came out of his eyes.

-

As it got dark the two of us stood up and walked towards the dorms together. I wrapped my arm firmly around Matsuri's waist just like I could protect him this way. I wished so much I could take his pain away but I had no chance.

People stared at us. They started to whisper as we passed by, but I did not give a damn. I was with Matsuri – nothing else mattered.

We went to his room and despite of his protest I made him rest while I called the hospital only to hear that there was no improvement. Hashiba and Fujimori were still missing, the police already informed.

I left some time later when he had fallen asleep from enervation.

-

Now I'm on my way to my own bedroom. I want to stay at Honjou-kun's but actually I was wearing these clothes since yesterday morning so I really need to change. I am in the very act of opening the door when I'm called.

"Nakajima-san, may I have a word with you?" I indeed feel like refusing when I turn around to face Endo Yuki a reporter of the school-newspaper and last but two person I want to see today.

I'm sure he wants to question me about Minato-sensei and even write an article about that occurence – I really don't like people who take advantage of other's suffering.

I try to stay friendly but shortspoken.

"What can I do for you, Endo-san?" I ask "I'm sorry I have no further information about Minato-sensei's condition." I want to stop the conversation before it started.

Endo smirks.

And I don't like him smirking. It's more than inept.

"Oh, I know that, candidate for presidency Nakajima." He answers.

What is this going to be?

"So, Endo-san?" In fact I don't want to know what he wants, I can already imagine.

"As you know, Nakajima-san." He stretches the 'san' and grins even more – I start to hate this guy. "There is still your interview missing. For the candidacy you remember? It shall be published shortly before the election so that people can compare the candidates and stuff…."

"Sure." I agree. Oh no! "We should make a fixed day and…"

"That won't be necessary, Nakajima-san." Endo interrupts me. "I suppose our interview will be a short one. For that we can do it even at once. There is only one question I would ask you."

"That is?" I'm getting some kind of annoyed.

"Do you really think, Nakajima-san." He points out "that a… relationship with Honjou Matsuri would be suitable for a president? I mean he may be handsome and I'm sure he has some other…amenities but as we all know: he is a jerk."

WHAT THE…?

I have already clinched my fist, then I stop myself. That's what he wants I come to think.

"As you know, Endo-san." I put out in the most sarcastic tone I have, smiling coldly "Being the captain of the karate team I could easily break every bone in your body which heals slowly." I smile even brighter as I add: "And believe me I really feel like doing this right now."

I wait one moment to look at Endo, who stands frozen. His mouth opens but he doesn't know what to say. So I continue letting out my anger:

"But in fact why should I dirty the hands which are touching my lover with you, Endo, when all I can feel for you is compassion? You think Matsuri is a jerk? I think you are poor. If you really can't see what kind of person he is you are nothing but blind. Matsuri is the damn best person I have ever met. If you don't like him – bad luck. Someone who is so friendly, so warm and so caring… If you think a person like him was not suitable, if it's not suitable for a president to be with the one he loves, you know what? If it is like this I don't give a damn about the presidency." I blew a strain out of my face and felt the rage easing.

"If you would excuse me now, Endo-san." I subjoin with the cold smile and step in my room. Dammit.

-

_Five days later._

It's election day today and you may think I should be around the school campaigning. But I don't think so. In fact it's not that I would have some better things to do, I don't have actually. Today there are no lessons, no club-activities, meetings or anything, only the election. I'm hanging here in my room doing nothing but hoping Matsuri might drop over. We didn't see each other that much the last week. He was too busy celebrating the prosperous union of Hashiba Sora and Fujimori Sunao. Both returned unharmed one day after their disappearance – being a love couple, just like Matsuri wished for them. And he was right: they are a perfect match, I'm happy for them, too. What makes it even better is that Minato-sensei regained conciousness shortly before that event and he is on the mend. Yeah, everything is perfect. Everthing? Hm, one might contradict, because all my work for the student council came to dust, but I don't see it like this. Sure, I lost every chance on the presidency – if you ever candidate for a political office: never pick a fight with a journalist! However I'm happy the way it is. Finally I'm with Matsuri (if he would finally be here even for only a minute) and that's all I ever dreamt of. I'm happy, don't mind the election, it's…

"Nakajima!" My boyfriend broke the habit of knocking from the first time we kissed.

I smile and turn around to see him. Good things come to those who wait.

"You…" I stop abruptly when I see him waving with the school-newspaper. Oh, dammit.

"Did you read the special edition for the election, Nakajima-san?" Honjou-kun grins brightly.

"Not yet." I answer honestly and take the paper from him.

On the front page is a large portrait of Matsuri and me together. My love watches me as I read the text below: It starts quoting exactly what I said to Endo some days ago '…if it is like this, I don't give a damn about the presidency..' and continues with talking about the fact I wanted to break some of the author's bones….

"Um." I furrow my brows.

Matsuri giggles and pulls me into an embrace.

"I didn't know you love me this much, Nakajima-san." He whispers into my ear.

"I do." I admit quietly. Finally my words go hand in hand with my feelings.

Matsuri kisses me.

He lays his lips on mine tenderly, then he pulls me closer to deepen the kiss. I have my legs turn to jelly and feel like dying in his arms. Softly Matsuri bites my bottom lip and I allow his tongue to slip in. I'm overwhelmed by the heat flowing through my body.

I don't care about the article, about the election, about anyone else.

All I can think of are Matsuri's lips on my neck, his hands in my shirt, his skin on mine…

…

I wake up naked with a slight pain in my lower region cuddled closely against Matsuri.

I look up and see into my lover's eyes.

"'Morning." I whisper. Who cares for the stars outside the window?

Matsuri smiles warmly and kisses my forehead.

"Good morning, Nakajima." He replies softly.

"Matsuri, would you do me a favor?" I ask him.

"Sure." He mumbles in my hair.

"Could you call me by my first name 'Kaoru'?"

"K-aor-u." It's like he was celebrating my name.

"I would love to call you like that." Matsuri finally agrees smiling "So now I have a K'u-chan of my own.

My own."

**The end**

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Ok, ok, I know. Stupid word-play with K(aor)u-chan and Kuu-chan. Yeah. But infact this was the reason for writing this story: I wanted Matsuri to have a love for his own. He always cared about others and I wanted someone to care about him. Matsuri is my favourite character of Sukisho/Sukisyo, he should have tons of fans! ;)

Finally this story is completed. It's my first with more than one chapter and I truly hope you liked it. Thanks to everyone for going through all the chapters with me! For a little bonus (and lots of author's notes) please check out the next chapter.

Tons of thanks to my sister for being my beta - you're great!

Lots of love, sunshine


	8. Bonus

**A little bonus**

_Shortly before the OVA_

…

"You could still join us."

"Oh, I wish I could do slave work for you in a plush rabbit costume, but unfortunately I don't want to." I respond wryly.

"So.. how about doing slave work for me as a sexy panther?"

"Not in public." I smirk. "Anyway I have got to handle some applications, therefore…."

"You will miss me like crazy."

"Sure." I say ironically. "I will miss you like crazy when you are away for three days." Actually I will.

"And two nights." Matsuri steps close to me.

"Matsuri-chan! Come on!" Fujimori calls from outside the room.

"It's just for the weekend, you will see him again!" Hashiba adds impatiently.

"I think you should go now." I nod towards my boyfriend. "I will be ok with your three-days-and-two-nights-absence." I affirm.

Matsuri just steps closer, looking into my eyes fervently.

"You know, president Nakajima, that one gets blind by touching himself."

He grabs me.

'There is no need to worry', I want to put out, but trying to offer resistance is futile with Matsuri's hand between my legs.

"MATSURI-CHAN!" Fujimori calls anew.

"Yeah, yeah." My lover shouts towards the door, not stopping to tease me.

Instead he leans forward and whispers

"You will miss me like crazy." licking my earlobe.

My heart hightails as Matsuri leans back again to look into my face.

"I will miss you like crazy." I accede breathless.

Now Matsuri cups my cheeks with his hands.

"I will miss you, too." He smiles.

I wish for a kiss – unavailing. Matsuri breaks the touch and heads for the door.

Shortly before leaving he turns around to me.

"I love you, Kaoru." Matsuri says tenderly and finally walks out the door.

I breathe deeply slumping on my love's bed.

The pillow smells like Matsuri's hair and reminds me of the feeling when strands of it tickle my belly. Matsuri. Damn Matsuri. You daffy-acting-hyperactively-photo-taking-weirdo! Dammit. I already miss you like crazy. I can think of nothing else but you. Although I really have to sit down on my desk and work now. After not seeing him for three days – and two nights – I won't be able to walk the entire next week. Dammit Matsuri.

Dammit.

Dammit.

Dammit.

Dammit.

Dammit.

I love you so much, Matsuri.

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Nakajima Kaoru was elected to be the student's president of Seishin academy. An important reason for this occurrence might be the article Endo Yuki wrote about this candidate. It was titled: 'Integrity - or what a president should say'. _

_The vice-president who was voted for by overwhelming majority, however, refused the office – well grounded: he was unable to work together with Nakajima Kaoru, they would both die of exhaustment, Honjou Matsuri stated._

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* * *

**Author's notes:**

Once my nee-chan who loves Shinomia said, Kaoru should end up with him. But I asked: "What about Matsuri?? I'm writing this ff because I don't want him to be lonely! I love Matsuri too much."

So she thought about a love between Matsuri and Shinomia. But I screamed: "What about Kaoru?" I will always be on the side of people who love Matsuri.

Now my cute nee-chan wants a sequel about Shinomia-san and Iwai-senpai. Hehe, I'm so glad she is happy with the way it turned out. She went through this story with me faithfully and cared a lot.

My little sister is my beta, my #1 fan and my inspiration. Without her this story would not exist, I owe her my sincere thanks.

Thank you so much for your help, I love you, sis! Please publish your own fanfics! (They are far better than mine.)

I also would like to thank the reviewers. I'm always glad for comments, because they are a real help and a great motivation. Thank you!

And last but not least, many thanks to everyone who reads this! Thank you for giving me a chance and going all the way with me.

My only remaing wish is now, that you love Matsuri the same as Kaoru does.

I do. ;)

Spread the love!

Sunshine.


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